The House by the Cemetery (1981)

SYNOPSIS: Strange things happen when a family moves into a mansion next to a cemetery. They find a maggot-spewing zombie doctor living in the basement!
HIGHS: A beard & a turtleneck - two things Sammy enjoys in a man. Baby Mick Jagger (named BOB of all things) - lips! lips! lips! Freudstein! Gore-fest! Super intense eye closeups.
LOWS: Quality voice over skills. That's one mighty bat - death by scissors, Bob gets splattered. Tiny axe to the rescue.
MEMORABLE LINES: Real estate agent: Damn tombstone!

Sammy: 6/10
Johnny: 4/10
Sian: 5.5/10

The Legend of Hell House (1973)

SYNOPSIS: Exciting chiller about 4 psychic investigators and the dark, brooding mansion they call the "Mt. Everest" of haunted houses. It will thrill and delight from the first creaking door to the last slithering shadow.
HIGHS: Shadow sex scene (saucy!), attack (stuffed) black cat, sweet camera spin, staged zoom-in (dramatic!), kinky ghost sex (hot!).
LOWS: Dead cat in shower :(
MEMORABLE LINES: Possessed Miss Tanner to Roddy: You might have been hot stuff when you were fifteen, but now you're SHIT! Mrs. Barrett to Mr. Barrett: Can I help you with something? Mr. Barrett: No, it's too complicated. (In sexist, demeaning tone.)

Sammy: 5/10
Special Guest Panel:
Pin: 5/10
Ingrid: 4/10
Daniel: 5.5/10

The Blob (1988)

SYNOPSIS: A vile, malignant life-form crashes to earth - untroubled by intellect. It does only one thing - and it does it well!
HIGHS: So gross it's awesome! That's one crafty blob - who knew a blob could have tentacles? All the better to pull the victims in. Blob so scary - Johnny does not like. Some sweet mullets. Bruno bites it head-first down the drain. Blob-sicles.
LOWS: Surprisingly, none!
MEMORABLE LINES: Kevin Dillon: All I saw was an old man with a funky hand. Army Dude: Chew on that, slime ball! Movie Trailer: If it had a face, you could look it in the eye! Terror has no shape.
NOTES: Only the greatest movie with a blob EVER!

Sammy: 6/10
Johnny: 7.5/10
Sian: 6.8/10

Midnight Movie (2008)

SYNOPSIS: A psycho killer escapes from an asylum and returns years later to watch a screening of a slaughter film he wrote, directed and starred in back in the 70s.
HIGHS: Daniel Bonjour - a poor man's Luke Perry. 8 toes are hot!
LOWS: The magic fear monster.
MEMORABLE LINES: Biker Mamma: This toothpick give you a hard on? Biker Dude: Testosterone, babe! Hippie: Look - a leprechaun! Stop - I want to dance with him.

Sammy: 3/10
Johnny: 2/10
Sian: 2/10

The Wizard of Gore (2007)

SYNOPSIS: A crotch-stuffing Crispin Glover stars as the Wizard of Gore, a greasy-handed magician whose lovely assistants all turn up dead.
HIGHS: Blood wrestling and Brad Dourif as Billy bob Thrornton. Ghetto Alice Cooper. Sammy likes crotch-stuffing Crispin.
LOWS: Maggot eating. "Herbals in Your Mouth" - classy! Enough with the paper bag already.
MEMORABLE LINES: Ed: Make like a bunny and bounce.

Sammy: 4/10
Johnny: 3/10
Sian: 3/10