Beyond Re-Animator (2003)

SYNOPSIS: 14 years after the Miskatonic University Massacre, Dr. West finds himself in jail, experimenting on rats! But when young MD Howard turns up as the prison doc, Dr. West discovers something left behind all those years ago. Starring a poor man's Christina Applegate and Vincent Price.
HIGHS: Milk-loving zombie - all you need is tongue! Moose eats the rat. Rat snacking on dick (ew!).
LOWS: Surprisingly, NO LOWS!
MEMORABLE LINES: Prison Guard: Think about it; dubious. Prison Dude: This green shit rules. Now fuck off! Poor Man's George Michael (in the DVD extras - a music video!): Come, re-animate your feet!
NOTES: Special effects by Screaming Mad George. Don't miss the Re-Animator music video: Re-Animate your dead bones.

Sammy: 6/10
Johnny: 6.5/10
Sian: 8/10

The Unborn (2009)

SYNOPSIS: The unborn twin of a poor-man's Megan Fox comes back to haunt her 20 years later.
HIGHS: Ant-bee in the cracked egg. Toilet bowl bugs. Eli the crawling cripple with the upside down head.
LOWS: Preist/B-Ball coach - who knew?
MEMORABLE LINES: Boyfriend: Those glasses are giving me wood! and One minute she's fine, and then she has a bitch-flip! Creepy Kid: He doesn't want you to help her. Friend: Fuck off you little shit!

Sammy: 5/10
Johnny: 4/10
Sian: 7/10
Polly: 7/10
Dimmy: 6/10